april’d away in bed

*1.50 pm* typing away some blabber whilst sitting at the dining table. Mau is not very happy about my presence, she keeps giving me cold stares.

Last night I had a conversation with a friend about how laziness attracts negativity and that inspired to finally get my ass off the bed and write. For the last 3 weeks I have been home- jobless and lazy. I go to bed at 3 am and wake up by noon and whenever I’m awake, I’m still in bed watching some movie or serial. Bottom line is I have spent the entire month doing nothing productive. Since the last one year I had been looking forward to this break but now that I have it, I hate it. I hate how non-productive and useless my days are, and that has made me really sad and frustrated. I guess I miss the daily hustle in Bombay. I miss getting up early and rushing to work, doing something productive, being tired by the end of the day and dozing off. Isn’t it strange how we miss the sun when it starts to snow, but miss the snow when it is sunny. It’s damn weird how humans function- we’re never happy or satisfied completely- we just want more or maybe we want a little of everything. Point is, I’m sad despite of wanting this month-long break so badly but things are going to change soon. I start my new job next month (yeah, that’s my big news!) so there’s that silver lining.

On the writing front, I am falling way behind. I did not start the screenplay draft that I had the planned to do this month. Nor did I read as many books as I had decided to. I have basically f*ked up this whole month by doing nothing but being mad at everyone around me for no reason at all.

I met a lot of relatives and cousins (mom just loves to host get-togethers every weekend) and attended about five funerals (yeah, death is at peak this month). I also celebrated my mother’s 47th birthday and didn’t get her any gift. I probably should have bought her the sling bag she wanted. You’re right, I should be looking it up online right now. On it!

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