they’re talking marriage

I am a girl in her mid-twenties, Indian (with all due sanskars) and an only child to a financially sound couple ($$$) which most would consider a luxury- and who am I kidding, it is. I’ve never had to live in the conditions that my parents have grown up in, nor do I have to struggle to buy things I want (which are usually books, bags or shoes, just saying). I also hold a masters degree in Geology – currently useless (don’t get me wrong, I love the subject I just don’t use it anymore) but I am earning pretty well by writing stuff- so boom, there’s that! Also, both mum and dad’s families have played their part so bless the gene-pool, I have occasionally been complimented for my looks. Basically, I’m a good catch. A package, if you may.

Perfectly ready to be married off!

Like a freshly baked bread.

But I don’t understand the compulsive need of my relatives to get me married. What satisfaction are they going to get by making sure I’m settled with a Man? How will it make them happy if I get locked down and go through near-death pregnancies? (to make kids who will be equally arrogant btw, I mean look at the mother they’re getting)

They tell me that if I give it a try, I will get all I need- a guy who is respectful and kind, has a decent sense of humour, money and some average values that align with mine? A guy who can keep me happy (now define happy, will you?) and also make my parents happy. Well, I am sure such a guy exists, but as opposed to what I need, that is not what I want.

Why do all the relatives pile up their opinions about marriage when a girl is in her 20s? (Is this a mid-life crisis sort of a thing?)

They ask me for the kind of guy I’d like (as if its a dish I’ll be served). Tall, dark and handsome definitely doesn’t make the cut- they want the deets.

So now that they’ve bugged me with this, I would like to tell them that I want someone who doesn’t just send a “take care” message when I’m unwell, but gets medicines delivered to me to really make me better. I want someone who’d travel four hours just to be with me for one. Someone who’d always push me to be better in whatever I’m doing, makes realize my worth if I were to forget it on some days. Someone who can sit by me when I am crying on the bathroom floor. Someone I can pop pimples with, or stay up the entire night talking about serial killers. Someone to go around the world with, someone dad can play cricket with and mom cracks up with. Someone who would make an effort, always, because they know I do too. I desire a passionate love which is beyond the societal norms of what a marriage should be like. Get me a friend and a companion who is down to go through everything with me but also leave me be. A love that knows it has a feeble chance of survival and still wants to take that chance, every time. I desire a marriage of that sort. That’s my list. Please find a suitable groom, thank you.

P.s. This post turned out to be quite different than what I had thought it would be. I am not sure if it even makes sense. Its the hormones guys, PMS is a b*tch! G’night.

6 responses to “they’re talking marriage”

  1. We cannot help the people from the previous generation. So keeping that aside the second part of your blog is something I really like. I was happy to read the qualities of the person you want to be with. It’s important to get honest with people about who you are, what you want & how you expect to treated.
    Standards only scare off people not meant for you.


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